For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
