Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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