Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
