He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
