super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
they're like a gay fantastic four
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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