So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
