you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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