So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
