I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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