She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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