we have officially lost it.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
