My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
