Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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