I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
