my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
