Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Non-Jews are for practice
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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