Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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