Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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