He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
