is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
