So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
