I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
