Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
