I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
