I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
