I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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