fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
