I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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