gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
