they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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