Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize