Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
