Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize