went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Randomize