no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
