WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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