I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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