Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
