she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
