im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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