would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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