so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
