Just cropdusted the office
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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