And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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