it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
COCAINE IS GR8
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize