she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
