worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
