Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize
