Four minutes until I can fart!
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
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