I can text with my tongue
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
