so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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