Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Apparently you make a good broom.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
